31-12-2008

Year’s conclusion. ~~~ In no particular order, the belov: ~~~ A very busy year indeed. Probably the busiest since my first year in this life. Albeit, as I was able to decide the when and where, as opposed to a focused period of filming a movie, I rarely felt stressed out. ~~~ I think when one is not born into a business world per se, starting one’s own firm and running it succesfully must be one of those great thrills. For the uninitiated(?), it’s a daunting task, but once one gets into it the complications go away and the possibilities take over. Admittedly, I couldn’t manage without my accountant. I does feel good to be my own man, in my own house. Although the income from the firm doesn’t cover the kind of expenses we have, in this house and the circumstances around our lives, it certainly adds flavor; and next year Vibeke will see the financial benefits of it. I should hope so; I certainly spent enough hours as to merit that scenario. Very few hours were spent in leisure. I suppose I weren’t quite ready for the kind of hard work; thankfully, I remain hopeful, I was still able to be present in a family settings. When I wasn’t working, I spent time with the young one, and was the happier for it. Also meant not very much in which to enjoy the fruits of said labor. Having said as much, I did make the best use of that little time was actually spent in leisure. I recall watching very few bad movies, or reading any bad books. As such, very little time was vasted. In thus regard, it may have been the most effecient year ever. ~~~ UNI-C worries. Can’t say I hold great respect for my current employment. The climate within my workspace deteriorated as badly as to have me flee the ever-complaining colleagues in favor of the first floor department, where I also happen to apply most of development-time – so no great issue with those guys, and I must confess it was a joy to get away from all the bitching and to a place where one feels one’s work is appreciated and makes some kind of sense. Where one feels a difference is made by the hours one put in. I’m again at a place where I can grasp a notion of where I’m going with what I do, and that’s a good feeling. Such a strange development, I hadn’t planned on it but am very satisfied with myself in as much as I understood to react on and exchange for the better my negative surroundings. A bit of feng suei on my part, there. Out with the old, in with the new and improved. I guess some people – at least those whom I choose to not join office with – do not react well to change. Their greatest spite is not with the management, rather with their inability to react to changing circumstances, and find challenges in dealing with a new kind of project or technology. Unbeknownst to them, of course. Who would like to admit this to themselves. My first and foremost official job became a kind of a front, something which I could do to keep the bread on the table whilst applying labor elsewhere, in starting my own business. A great concern throughout, in as much as I’m directly competing with my primary work place. Did suffer some nightmares on that account. Someone once told me, believe it was Michael Moeller who worked on my movie, that all great fortunes were made within initially illegal circumstances. Well, as far as I was concerned this year, he may still prove himself right. Thankfully, due to the first-mentioned facets about my day-job, I’m left past caring if I do get fired or not. Getting sacked would mean six months’ paid vacation, in which I could built the company. I honestly believe I could manage a similar salary to what I make now if I had that kind of time to devote to the firm of my own. ~~~ Got married around the end of the year, to a minimum of celebrations. A decisive factor, even; I didn’t have the grand wedding in me, and quite besides the financial side of things wouldn’t have allowed this. Methinks we’ll settle for a garden-party next Summer. Found few complaints from Vibeke, who apparently faced family expectations on this, and so enjoyed the get-away. The ceremony was fine, quite intimate, even; an apperance before the mayor, a glass of port and a ‘yes’ and ‘I do’ and we got underway to Malmo, to wine and dine and stay at the Hilton for a night. I must confess – as remains no secret with anyone who questions my faith in the Christian marital system – I’m in it for the money. Certainly not that kind which I expect to gain by my spouse(!), rather the taxation system. As long as we as a country hasn’t worked out how to seperate church and state, there’s little sense in not abiding by the existing code. Especially as there are no disadvantages I can think of, at least so long as one holds one’s course and sticks by a relationship which has close to eight years to it. So I’m happy with the decision, and unlike fathering a child I wasn’t struck by anxiety attacks or the likes. I suppose the only things I did get was a mild case of the shits, which effectively found me at the hotel resturant restroom for half an hour, getting past the worst of it – and ‘enjoying’ half an hour of Michael Bolton’s greatest hits in the process. Which, I suppose, is some kind of memory. “How am I supposed to live without you” certainly has a different thing to it, now. ~~~ The Summer’s great news, of course, the jury’s decision to send V’s youth-novel to the number one spot of the Gyldendal publishing house’s novel-contest. More than a hundred entries, the winner took all, and she came from Soroe this time around. I must confess that win was a grand sucess on every conceivable level. Let’s do them from the top: Financially, first and foremost. My kind of priority, of course: If she had not made that money off that competition and following book deal, more than fifty thousand crowns, it would’ve been yours truly who’d had to fork out that cash to keep our economy afloat. And that surely would’ve been a strain on my account, in ways more than one. Self-confidence-wise, she gained enourmously. ‘Twas something she wanted more than anything, and to have a professional house such as Gyldendal paying tribute to her contribution meant the world to her, and effectively allowed her reason to stay her writer’s course. As opposed to a dreaded thought of going back to being a Pedagogue, or worse. Thirdly, she got out from under her dead brother’s shadow. His was always a looming presence, as his status as a published author of a children’s book and Dungeon and Dragon’s rule book had first billing with her mother, and grandparents. Which, truth be told, still holds true, only V regards herself in a different light now, more self-assured of her own worth and thus better equipped to claim her own when her dear mother doesn’t see her. Which is great, that she should arrive at such a state of mind. She even got the idea – and went through with it – of getting a tattoo of a symbol conceptuated by her brother. So she’s found that kind of confidence in herself, that she could carry his memory around and not feel lessened by her mother’s notion that her son weighed more in his life than her daughter does in hers. And, moreover, the confidence to continue writing, going on her second story and doing a helluva good job of it, doing better than the first. I am very proud of her, and hope her succes continues, for every reason apart from the alluring economical one. Hope also she’ll get to do some more seminars, as she grows as a person when she does them. ~~~ his kid of ours will turn the boys’ heads when she grows up, as much as for sure. I can see it very clearly, how her facial features will change over time. She is more and more beautiful for every day which passes, and that transtion will not stop any time soon. She longs to get to her fifth year of age, and probably the sixth after that. I hope she’ll find her options expand with every passing year, that’s the way it was meant to be. I am not concerned about this, she grasps more and more and her persona is such that she’ll work out that which appears missing to her. This year past she’s been a joy to be with. She is more and more confident of herself and her stance and attitude towar
ds life does her credit. She has a great sense of humor, too, she’d played the odd trick or two with us throughout. One complaint is that she’s near back in her old groove of not being apt at playing by herself, which gets very tiresome. It’s an uphill struggle, we coerce her into it and then it’s just the matter of a holiday and she’s back in business, so to speak, urging us along and being rather annoying in that process. I hope she’ll get around that fact soon, that we’re not at her disposal 24×7 simply out of having been so up until now. Admittedly, we’re ourselves – I, probably the worst – to blame in this. ~~~ In terms of keeping up with my friends, I think I managed despite the busy shedule. Ole was perhaps one who suffered, but then again he himself didn’t do too well in regards to updates, and I’ll be seeing him at work anyways. Rasmus seems to be doing fine, Mads just got back from one helluva ride filming in Indonesia, Lars Brink got the better of his job and I did manage to take time out to participate in Claus’ poker tournament, and will see him again in Aalborg in a few days. Dennis, a chapter of his own of course, taking to our basement and by the looks of it staying put for a spell. I doubt he’ll get a move on securing an apartment in Copenhagen. Not that the financial crisis doesn’t allow him ample opportunity, he’s just not that kind of guy, to tie himself up financially like that An apartment with his name on the door won’t bring him comfort if he can’t expell the lease within the month. So we’re seeing a lot of him, and that’s fine, too. He’s usually in a good mood, and he likes the little one and she knows he’s more physical than I so she tries to take advantage whenever she can. The extra money his presence grants us does make it easier, too, economically. Although he probably uses half of it in water and power and heat, the seven hundred crowns after those expenses are good to have. He seems happy in his new job, albeit very busy, so I guess things are looking up for him, especially after he got a distribution deal on his movie. I’m happy for him and hope he stays on for an extended period of time. I could have – and should have, probably – seen more of my friends as is, but beforementioned schedule prevented further interaction. In my own defense, luckily they were probably as busy as I, thus hard to get hold of. But that’s the way with friends, isn’t it, when one gets to be my age everyone has a million things to do. In further years, less busy ones, I’ll do better in seeking them out, or making new ones. ~~~ Family-wise status quo was easily maintained. Didn’t see too much of Sis, couldn’t been more than 3-4 times we met, which is of course a shame; yet she’s perhaps the hardest of all to get in touch with, extremely busy on her own schedule, so I won’t linger on that. She seems very happy, so I trust that’s the case. Also visited with the folks a handfull of times. Talk about status quo. They spend a lot of time in Viborg, caring for grandmum who’s likely going through her final years. I anticipate a call from dad informing me she’s gone. That’s the way, isn’t it. With mum and dad, well nothing much has changed. They go through their motions, although investigate the possiblities of a move. Don’t know how that’s gonna end up, just hope none of them will get a depression out of it. They’ve lived there forever, haven’t they. Should prove an interesting social experiment. Fear dad will have none of it, having worked all his life to pay for a house and now finally when there are no more mortgages to pay, they’re set to move on. I can appreciate as much, especially as he’s the one having to life with mum, who’s no doubt keeping him busy in having to listen to her no doubt frequent complaints. Don’t think she’ll react well to a move, to be honest. Thor and Philip, very few visits with them, naturally so in regard to the first-mentioned. The year saw him in Austria and Brazil, back and forth, and by the end of it we visited with him and his girlfriend, and her two kids from a different relationship, in Malmo; where he looked exceedingly uncomfortable, and I don’t think it was all by way of the virus he had the fortune to catch hold of. I hope the best for him, naturally. His seems a somewhat troublesome life. ~~~ ~~~ Script-wise, I got stuck. I must admit as much, I never achieved my objective. I got pretty close, page 93, which is guess in some respect is as far away from page 120 as is page 33, or 3. So, there; I missed a target. Now that has been a while, hasn’t it. In ways it feels rather liberating. Here goes, I’m only human. Who would’ve thought. So that’s one for the next year, I guess. It’s not that my motivation is lacking, only I prioritized making a living over penning a script. A different kind of self-fullfilment, that is. I still enjoy it very much, the writing progress. But taking care of the bills, in a situation where only one of us is enjoying full-time labor, doesn’t allow me time to spare. So it will wait, alas, and see what kind of time the new year will bring. I would very much like to have that done with, the story seems to hold such potential if only I can manage to unlock it. Yet then that’s the case with all stories, isn’t it. ~~~ So there it is. 2008. Somethings I managed, others not. Most of what I started got finished. I didn’t waste much time; a criteria for succes in its own right. The above holds fewer philosophical contemplations as opposed to previous year’s conclusions, doesn’t it. This is actually very sympthomatic of the year, which went mostly to doing things, rather than planning and conceptualizing. Then again, it’s been the other way around for many years, hasn’t it? Shouldn’t it be about time I put some of that contemplation to use in actual work. I’m confident the next year, 2009, will be more of the same as this one near past offered. Certainly there will be further chance of trying out new things, setting new goals, of which some will be reached and some will not. I’m just a tad bit better equipped to handle the latter scenario as of late. As philosophical as I’ll get this year, I think in life it’s rather healthy to get to a stage where one learns not all plans are meant to be realized, i.e. one cannot meet every goal one has, there simply isn’t enough time. We are lucky, in fact, those of us who manage to meet just a handful of all the goals we set out to meet. Life may intervene around the corner; we have no way of knowing what is in stock for us. All we can do is to maximize the time we do have, and I certainly feel as if I did exactly that this year. Bring on the new one; I look much forward to it, as much as if I was just twenty.

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