19-10-2010

In the morning drove to the Hamlet private hospital in Copenhagen and got my chest ultra-sound scanned, in a bid to discover the cause of the lump in my chest. Had feared the worst; but the doctor in attendance was able to identify a mere factured rib as the culprit. And so, fifteen minutes at a rate of a hundred crowns per minute later, I was acquitetted of any major causes of illness. ~~~ So fragile when you have kids. And that’s the way it’ll stay throughout the end of my life, when in hopefully a less due time that end will near. I accept that; and accept also this opportunity as a wake-up-call of sorts. I have not been taking decent care of my body of late, in as far as working long hours have made me prone to sweets and too much sitting down. I could, and will, do a better job at taking care of my body. But also I’ll make a promise to be more secure in my family setting. I have had a lot of complaints, voiced on the inside, about this life, and they mostly spring from a regret of not having been around some more in my youth, or about not having had the time to do that which I require of myself to do because of family obligations. But were I to consider myself settled, here and now, would I not become more at ease, and regard those obligations as a natural thing to deal with and not one which is holding me back? I stood in front of the mirror, having sent the wife and son off to Germany, to meet with our girl and her grandmother there, and felt rather like a sorry chap, not having any of the familiar sounds surrounding me. Though my mind may be in denial at times, methinks my ears, indeed my whole body, has come to wholly accept said here and now as a fact. Well it’s about time I made my mind settle down as well. I won’t become less fragile, I’m aware, but I do trust I’ll become more at ease, and that’ll be a life-changing notion on par with eating healthier. ~~~ Got a letter from the civil medical service, well ‘civil’ may be the wrong phrase; they got me a time for an ultra-sound scan, alright. On December 14th. Think I’ll close the book on that one… ~~~ Tomorrow Wednesday. Am hoping for a quiet day.

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