May 20th, 2012.

Came across a box of old memories whilst cleaning out the basement. All my old school stuff, from Kindergarten to Skive. Did’t commit to going through it, just skimmed the pages of the binder. Can’t remember if I myself or Mum on my behalf put it together, but a good job ’twas, cronologic all the way through. Right choice of material, too, most of the pages speak of incidents note-worthy to my present place in the world. Defining moments. A lot of names and dates I’d forgotten, and will again. It’s a good box to have, and to keep.

Got V and the kids home from their foray into camping, then went and retrieved the wagon. A sorry sight it is, and falling apart, but can’t bring mysef to care. On my way back drove into a cat, suddenly running across the road. I couldn’t have prevented it, had I braked I would’ve caused an accident with those just on my tail, so I had to grit my teeth and keep going. Felt the bump, then in my mirror saw it retreat the way it came, into the cornfield from where it’d commented its crossing. So now there’s a cat roaming with broken legs, or severe internal injuries, just lying about in pain, waiting for the fox or waiting to starve to death. Felt so, so bad about myself. Guilt and self-doubt creeps in, ‘could I have prevented this’ etc. I guess I should be glad I’m suffering so much just because of this, there are those in this World who would not bring themselves to care one iota about something similar. So I can’t be a terribly bad person, can I. Still I feel like shit.

Tomorrow Monday. Official holiday week, equals lots and lots of things to do around the house. Look forward to it, gettings my mind off work. This past weekend, too, has been great for knocking down chores I’d wanted to do for ages but never got around to. So it’s not a ‘basking in the sun’ kind of holiday, but it’s mind kind of holiday, right here, now, for sure.


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