August 22nd, 2017.

Met up with Kenn, at his behalf, for a matinee-screening of ‘Dunkirk’ at the Imperial. Was glad I did; had wanted to try and avoid it, but it turned out okay. He’s not the big talker, but he seemed content to listen to my ramblings, and I had apparently a need to rid myself of some I’ve been keeping to myself…? So good therapy, he was very symphathetic. He’s full of surplus, he reeks of it, lucky sod. The movie was good, too, and I hadn’t been to the Imperial for many years, even. Hasn’t changed a lot, if at all. As with all the theatres, no-one sells you a ticket anymore – you have to make friends with the machine that dispenses the admissions. What will friend-less people do, in our future age? No one will there to serve them personal interaction. It’s a sad state of affairs. Was glad he made the contact, will try and be the one who does it, next time out.

V’s fretting so, about that irregular bleeding downstairs, so to speak. Am thinking – hoping, praying – she’s overly concerned as per her usual, and being dramatic about it because she’d rather pay the emotional cost up front; this way she’s prepared herself for the worst, and so if that should happen, well she’d be equipped. So glad money’s not the issue here, preventing her from going to the private sector when the public won’t suffice – so she’s got a date, 12th of September, where she’ll be checked by dr. amazing, at the Hamlet private hospital. This is, in turn, what I prepared for, in hiding those odd grand I got from the sale of the company.

Heard – finally – from the IRS: I’m through to the second rounds of talk in regards to that job, albeit there’s a test that needs aceing, first. There’s always a test, isn’t there… Ridiculous. At least it’s technical in nature, this time around. Am glad I made it thus far. A liberating sensation, having waited so many days beyond the first interview.

August 18th, 2017.

Went to a company-sporting event, a 3-person triathlon. Did the running part, 4 kilometers, in a very decent time. Gave it my all, and should stop doing that, really. Getting too old for it, gunning for the flag, heaving for breath, pondering a stroke. Signed up for the fun and games of it all, but when the rest of the bunch are dia-hard competitors and racers in the hearts, well it’s tough to just lay back and proclaim you’re just there to enjoy the scene. So did my bit, and was glad when it was over. Actually was glad I did it, period. The trip on the Metro and the generic ‘Coffee-break’ playlist on Spotify and the boardwalk out there – Amager Strand – set off a lot of emotions within me. It’s good to get out and about once in a while, isn’t it, and I guess a lot of factors just came together to suddenly enable some good ol’ fashioned dreaming. I was looking to the neat apartment-buildings overlooking the water, and found myself contemplating going international at some point. There are still so and so many projects I want to design and build, and I still want to see me the World some more. What will it take for that to become a reality, I wonder?

August 11th, 2017.

Working a bit in the basement, at the odd hour of two o’clock. Taking down cabinets, shelves, all in preperation of doing the basement makeover. Listening to old American top-40 hits, meanwhile. Missed my window of sleep, see, this despite not getting enough resting hours for a few days. Don’t feel stressed out, but am guessing that this thing with me sleeping with V isn’t working. She seldom goes to bed before midnight, so there’s lots of lights and commotion, and I’ve been used to sleeping in darkness, with lots of silence surrounding me. She’s not doing herself any favors, though – she gets tired during the day and sleeps on the couch, so never gets quality sleep when the real time comes. Bad habits will come back to bite her. And possibly me, if this continues – but let’s see if not the tides will change, when school starts; she did tell me that she wanted to start going to bed earlier, and getting up sooner.

Going for two completely different jobs; one very creative, one very management-like. Gets me thinking about life’s choices, of different scenarios for different actions. I’m thinking – hoping – there’s still time to go about the heart’s desires, rather than think boring, secure, safe. So here’s to hoping the firstmentioned job will come through – am interviewing with them on Monday.

Man, this North Korea vs. USA-stuff is getting to me. Really, truly hope someone somewhere won’t do something stupid, that’ll set off a chain reaction. Too much ‘War Games’ going on here.

Makes me a tad bit sad that K and N will never – likely – experience, in the same fashion as did V and I, going into a music-shop and browsing CD’s. Going for the latest greatest album, but then being inspired about some disc in the budget-section. I know there’re different channels for that now – and am perusing Spotify just here and now – but they just smelled so nice, those shops, didn’t they.

So, yea, crap about the sleep. But am enjoying the silence, and it just being me and my thoughts. And the music, going back in time for a while there (Skive), and the progress I’m gaining. So’s not all bad.

 

August 9th, 2017.

Listening to music at work, really enjoying the base-lines on Don Henley’s Greatest Hits-album. ‘New York Minute’ in particular has magnificent base-undertones.

V and the kids should be back today, after their brief visit to Funen. Got lots of small stuff done while they were away; painting, plastering, put up lights, put stuff up for sale. Even went up to the roof and fixed – albeit only temporarily – some broken tiles. Man, that roof haunts me. So close to giving in. Don’t want to spend the huge amount of money to fix it, yet don’t want it to rain in on us, either. So what’s a poor man to do.

August 6th, 2017.

This house has been made much simpler to live in, within the 3 weeks I’ve had my holiday. Thus easier to keep. I’ve enjoyed the progress I’ve made, though naturally there’s a lot to do still. And there’s time in which to do it. I amaze myself, what with what I seem to accomplish. Am rarely standing still, unlike some. Was disappointed to learn the house isn’t worth much – to be honest, I had higher hopes. But will try and do something about it soon. Fixing up the basement should improve on the price-tag. And then it’s December until that’s done, at least, and the lesser the light, the better to hide this horrid house’s imperfections.

Back to work, but how long will I last there, I wonder. Hopefully not long – in as much as I naturally hope the job-applications I sent out will prove successful.

I do sometimes ponder what will happen to us, V and I, as the kids move out. I fear we might go our different ways. Particularly, I fear I might from time to time blame her of her laziness throughout the years. I think of this house, and this ground on which it stands, and wonder how magnificent it would appear if she had the work ethics as do I. A bigger ask, but even half of it would suffice, methinks. But that’s quite a stretch from the current conditions. I must admit I increasingly often lose respect for her, as she points out that she never has any time to herself. Most women would envy her the kind of lifestyle she leads; concerned with only the kind of duties she fancies to take on, with no regular work to prevent her from spending the hours doing them, and with ample time to entertain herself when she’s not engaged in them. I’m bugged by the way that she, when she picks up a book, absolutely has to finish it, utterly unable to postpone it until a more suitable time. Thus she’s unreachable for family affairs, completely engulfed – until a brief interlude, before the next novel or movie. It’s not in her persona to change that, I’m aware, the illusion of free will and all that. Still I might hope in vain that she would look to yours truly, and compare choices of activities – and correspondingly question whether her activities benefits the entire family, or just herself, which is usually the case. And hence my worry, that in due time, when children do not occupy us the most, if that continuous lack of respect becomes too great to remedy?

 

July 30th, 2017.

Slept very poorly last night. Dog’s shoring woke me up. I guess that’s what I get from going to bed earlier than the others in the house. It’s hard to imagine, if one hasn’t experienced it, how loud that dog will snore. Much, much louder than V. I hate to admit to it, but I wish it would give up life sooner, rather than later. Such a needy animal. The kids like it, sure, but the cynical me thinks ’tis become a fixture, not unlike a piece of the furniure. Can’t go back to the basement now, would look odd when we put the houes up for sale. Maybe I should do it whilst the houes isn’t on the market. Had a bite to eat and then went into the basement and cleared a lot of stuff out. Truly, a lot. Tomorrow will take the third huge load of carbage and old stuff to the recycling station. I cannot believe how much I’ve taken there this weekend. So much stuff. Another thing that would be hard to imagine, all that crap.

Offered to help Simon Duncan, and so went there from 9 to 13 and did some demolition work – basically taking his swimming pool down. Came with the house he got, now he hasn’t a need for it. Fun work, though hard as hell. But hope to sleep better tonight because of it. In exchange of which he’ll store some of my moving boxes of books and dvd’s. And my electronics-stuff, that I packed last night. I like him; he’s an honest guy, doesn’t try to hide his feelings, or, rather, he’s confident in them. The divorce has obviously been tough, but I think he’s handling it really well. He let me know that I was always welcome, and there’s enough beer in his fridge for sure. So am thinking I’d try and hang out some more. He’s got a lot of skills I might learn from, too. A swell guy.

V slept on the couch for most of the day. As was the case yesterday. So I guess it’s hard to do a family-festival. Ah well, so I always knew she’s not a bundle of focused energy, now is she. That’s her persona, I’m glad it’s not mine. She sure doesn’t move around much. Right this minute I feel very alone in these moving plans.

Entering the last week of the holiday. Has been an awesome one, got so much done. And still need do much, but it’s coming together and, again, all that I do now I won’t need to again later.

Made a note of a sweet product I saw at the local home depot; artificial grass, totally indistinguishable from the real thing. 140 crowns per square meter, for grass that nevers needs cutting, will never fade in color, will never find weeds growing through it. Something tells me I’ll be in need of that soon enough. Should buy a meter and try it out.

July 27th, 2017

Still alone in the house, V and the kids still at Langelands Festival. So am amusing myself by installing the ventilator in the kitchen, and doing lots of other stuff that needs doing.

Second realtor dropped by – like him much, much more than the other. Not at all up-tight. He was, however, quick to turn down my ‘dream scenario’ of getting out of here with 300K surplus. Expect him to set it at 1.5 million. Which, come to think of it, is damn near what I gave for the place when I got here. Ah, well. Never thought of it as an investment. At least I’ll be sure I get a lot of my invested money and time back, and that’s a big comfort. So it’s still a ‘go’, though I’ll still need get busy doing all those things that need doing. That I might then look forward to not doing anymore, for a considerable span of years, when we’ll be renting,

I don’t want to be moot about that not getting as much out of it as I’d thought. There’s years and years ahead in which to make more money, and, besides, I’ve learned so much about tools and materials and how to mix them, that I would’ve never learned it we had not lived here – and so I take that away, too, and given what I’m planning to do with that knowledge and skill-sets that’s worth a lot, too. I can look back at most of the projects I’ve undertaken and be satisfied that they worked, and in time worked even very well. So there.